I Love You

Hit the brakes, throw it in reverse and let’s discuss on of my favorite phrases, “I love you”.

Don’t panic or get all clammy. I love you, a phrase that can have such a major impact on a life that most are even afraid to utter. When is the right time to say this?

If you’re anything like Ted Mosby from the TV series How I Met Your Mother you might say it after your first kiss (this almost happened to me once…woof). The character’s friends gave him flack after expressing his love for Robin saying it was too soon, he wasn’t sure; but maybe he was in love with her?

Most people will tell you to wait after so many dates, months, or just wait till you’re overflowing with love but is there really a timing formula used for love?

Personally, I believe in a relationship there are many phases of love. You’re becoming friends first, getting to know the person. It may be just me, but if I consider you a friend, I love you. So you have that. Then there is the physical attraction you hold for the person; you can’t ignore the way their eyes look in the night, or the way their smile just gives you butterflies, and then there’s the way their hands look while you hold them. You love their personality and how you feel you can tell them anything. Put all of that together and I’d assume you’re beginning to fall in love.

So when is the right time to say the three word phrase that can change everything? I don’t know. I think you have to trust your gut and say it when you’re ready; whether its two seconds after your first kiss or Three weeks after your met the person…who knows; you do you.

Your partner may not be on the same page, so this can be terrifying. It puts you in a vulnerable state, but just take the leap and share your feelings. It shouldn’t be about timing but more of the environment of your relationship. I’m not a psychologist but I feel like loving someone should not be rocket science.

A fun fact about saying “I love you”: eHarmony released a statistic showing that 62% of men were more likely say the three words first in a relationship.  Research states that men begin to think about love within the first two months of dating while women typically entertain the thought at five months.

There was also a studied that showed that you decided if you like someone with in four minutes. So its obvious that the love factor is going to vary.

Now let’s discuss telling your friends that you love them. Saying that phrase doesn’t have to mean I’m in love with you. Telling someone you love them could just mean I’m glad I met you and that you’re in my life and you’ve made an impact on me.

There seems to be a stigmatism when it comes to expressing gratitude through love.  I feel you shouldn’t be afraid to thank someone through the three “weird” words.

My favorite response is “thank you”. Thank me for what? Being grateful for your help, or gifts, or positive thoughts when going through a rough patch and I needed a pick me up?

Let your guard down and enjoy one of the best gifts God has given us and that’s the ability to love and be loved. Follow that “thank you” with an “I love you too” Let someone in to make your day brighter. Those three words are like the equivalent of smiling and shining light on someone. Also while you’re opening up and letting someone say it to you, don’t be afraid to express your love for someone.

Always remember each one of you are loved.

Until next time Life, taxes and…

Josh